All posts by sonworshiper

Culture/Politics

Defining Moments

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A friend posted a riddle presented in his managment class. “If the day before the day before yesterday is Tuesday, what is the day after the day after tomorrow?”

I came up with Monday, since ‘today’ in the riddle seems to me to be Friday. He had the same answer. The instructor said he was wrong, and the answer to the riddle was Friday. My linguist friends and I started tearing this apart trying to sort out what the right answer is and how to arrive at it. Some argued that the conditional ‘if’ phrase is trumped by the present tense verb ‘is,’ kind of like a grammar version of PEMDAS, the rule that guides which part of a math equation one must complete first. Had the question been stated “was Tuesday” instead of “is,” then Monday would have been correct.

(Or so they claim. I have my doubts. Not to mention, searching for versions of that riddle on Google pointed toward a similar-but-clearly-worded variant, one which doesn’t play a trick based on verb tenses but simply asks the reader to figure out the puzzle. I suspect the lesson writers or instructor copied the riddle wrong from the start. But I’m arrogant about these things.)

My frustration with the explanation boils down to playing a trick of grammar rules and definitions. Rather than speak clearly, the riddle as explained by my linguist friends ignores common usage of language and depends on an oft-ignored rule that supposedly shifts the meaning completely from what is implied. It’s someone claiming a simple answer depends on what the definition of ‘is’ is–technically accurate and a proper debate tactic, but readily dismissed as shady or truth-dodging by the average person.

I thought of this little exchange when my Facebook exploded with a mixture of Cecil the Lion and all the videos about Planned Parenthood. I very nearly posted a tweet something to the effect of

Maybe if there was a market for lion parts, PP supporters could get behind hunting. #profitsmatter

Then I realized that would do no good. It alienates rather than persuades. It mocks issues people care about deeply. And I think we have plenty of that already.

I got the video link for a feminist declaring “Planned Parenthood Isn’t Selling Baby Parts, You F@#$ing Idiots” and a day later, the right-wing response “Planned Parenthood IS Selling Baby Parts, You Freaking Feminist Hosebeast.” (They also sanctimoniously called out the feminist for dropping f-bombs left and right, while they stooped to a ‘clean’ version of name-calling that is no better in my opinion.)

Meanwhile plenty of people point out the disparity between response to the PP videos and the slaying of Cecil the Lion. Plenty of tweets and posts encouraging the murder of that dentist, whether by lion mauling or by drilling him a new orifice. Whichever side of the aisle your circle of friends leans toward, no doubt you’re seeing a ton of outrage that invariably paints dissenters as morons, idiots, worthless human beings devoid of morality. “How can anyone support this?!” both sides scream, while talking about two different subjects.

We’re talking past each other. Everyone’s speaking but no one is listening.

When the right yells about baby parts, the left sighs at best or swears at them, because the legal definition in our country is “fetal tissue” or “medical waste” produced by a legal and optional medical procedure. There may be aspects that are legally questionable, like whether “sales” are taking place or procedures are being altered from what the patients consented to in order to produce better remains. But “by definition” they’re not selling baby parts, duh, because you have to remember what the definition of “fetus” is.

And the right shouts, “How can you care about a stupid lion more than you care about the horrors depicted in those leaked videos? Look at the evidence; listen to the words of the doctors and the staff.” Many will admit if pressed that they’d like to see the hunter who killed Cecil prosecuted for where he broke the law, if indeed that can be proven. But to most, it’s just a lion, and doesn’t compare with the human remains shown in the PP videos. Going from a religious or moral definition of all human life as being precious, the anti-abortion / pro-life crowd can’t help but be furious about the sale of baby parts — because you have to remember what the definition of “life” is.

We’re all heavily invested emotionally into so many various societal and cultural issues that it can be hard to hit the brakes and take a look around. Maybe it’s a debate about white privilege and the #blacklivesmatter trend. Maybe it’s the Confederate flag, or gun control. Maybe it’s a fight for rights we feel we’ve been denied, or a challenging sense that the comfortable culture we once knew is slipping and changing into something far different.

The river of outrage in this country seems neverending. It’s easy to forget that there are people just like us on both banks.

Locking in on my one point of view and refusing to consider the opposition only creates tension, division, and strife. Yes, we might never agree… but at least I can do you the courtesy of listening to find out exactly what I’m disagreeing with, and vice versa. (For example, here is a challenging view on Planned Parenthood from a Christian man faced with an impossible choice.)

I’m grateful for my friends on all sides of these discussions who are willing to have conversations and dig down to the roots of where our points of view diverge. I spent a good chunk of yesterday morning discussing the value of life and the question “When is it justifiable to kill another human being?” I don’t think either of us walked away with a different point of view, but we maintained the mutual respect we’ve developed over the years.

For me, that respect is what matters. Rather than debate words and call each other names, we’ve made sure to define our friendship first. We’ve defined our individual morality to include striving to show respect for others, and we make sure our conversations on these subjects are guided by that definition.

A mind that won’t listen can’t be changed. And when my first thought is that someone else is guilty of this, usually I figure out that it’s me.

Let’s not categorize ourselves with “us” and “them” on this or any other issue. We are not engaged in a civil war despite all the cultural issues and debates. We have to figure out how to be “we the people” because that’s what this nation is founded upon and defined by.

Writing

Woulda Coulda Shoulda

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It seems inevitable. You work on something for days, weeks, even months. You reach the point where you’re satisfied that this is a good, finished product. You click “Publish” or “Submit” or some equivalent…

…and immediately you notice mistakes. 

 

“Oh no… how did I miss that?!”
 
I participated in NaNoWriMo for the first time last year and completed a manuscript of a novel inspired by current events. Then I deployed to the Mid-East for almost four months, with grand intentions of re-reading and revising the draft (as well as finishing my fantasy novel, and starting a futuristic military novel). 

You know what they say about the best laid plans, and this was no exception.

In late May or early June I got the email from the nanowrimo account warning me that I would lose my reward of two free hard copies from CreateSpace if I didn’t use them by the end of June. I refocused my attention on the manuscript and got it ready for public release. I sent the materials into CreateSpace and started working on reformatting the document for the Kindle edition. 

Then I found the issues I wish I noticed sooner: two supporting characters whose plot threads could have been expanded and better resolved. Later feedback revealed an erroneous technical detail about hospital equipment that a little more research might have resolved. And while I got good in-person reviews from a couple first readers, I also learned they had a hard time connecting to the main characters–feeling what the characters felt, sensing their reactions to the various crises in the plot. 

So while I chalk this up as a win, I also have to recognize where I could have done better. 

1. Critique is essential. Bad on me for skipping it, since I wrote a book about this. Other readers see the weaknesses and mistakes I cannot. If I wasn’t going to pay the money for a professional editor, I should have taken the time to solicit some alpha readers’ input. 

2. There are five senses. It’s basic advice but a great reminder. A lot of the description in the novel provided sufficient detail for sight and somewhat for sound. But there are missed moments where taste, touch, and smell could have shined.

3. Plot like a roller coaster. Let the drama rise and fall to create pauses and build tension between rushes of excitement. Perhaps in the interest of trying to create good hooks, my characters go through a never-ending rush of drama, from one crisis to the next. I’m not saying everything should be happy go-lucky, but I could’ve included a few beats of humor or serenity in the midst of the chaos.

4. Good writing outshines wordplay trickery. I went with two characters with the same name as a way of driving home the point that we’re all pretty similar. In retrospect, the confusion that causes for readers doesn’t seem to be worth any supposed payoff. (Critique would have caught this… to her credit, my wife told me this was a problem and I foolishly went along with my grand plan instead.)

5. There’s no rush if you’re self-publishing. I let myself be fooled by the “deadline” of the nanowrimo reward. But that reward only saved me maybe five dollars. On the one hand, it spurred me to finish the project and get it out into the open, which I might not have otherwise done. On the other hand, it created a false sense of urgency that blinded me to some of the areas where I could have written a much better novel. Better to get it right than to regret missed opportunities. Like many things in life, victory in the battle to become a writer goes sometimes not to the swift. 

Lessons (hopefully) learned. I will do better next time. 

General

Justified Narcissism

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“So, what does it feel like to search for your name on Amazon and see your book appear in the results?”

A coworker asked me that the other day, and he’s not the first. 

I struggle with how to answer. Part of me is of course elated, proud, and satisfied at the sense of accomplishment. Not to the Swift is available on Kindle and in paperback. People (other than me) have bought copies. 

Like far too many fledgling writers, part of me fears my writing is rubbish and everyone knows it but me. Their questions are part of a joke that all my coworkers are in on. “If you need a laugh, ask Dave about what it’s like to be an ‘author.'” Hilarity ensues.

 

Dropping off the signed copy after work. If this is all a joke, I might as well have fun with it. And the $10 bill at least isn’t funny money.
 
Then again, most of the comments I’ve received are positive… or at least constructive criticism couched in an overall encouraging approach, the necessary bitter medicine hidden beneath a spoonful of sugar. I’m slowly building my confidence that what I’m writing is worth reading, and that’s a lovely feeling.
This week I stopped at a store with my teenage daughter. I checked the arts and crafts store (so called) here on base, then tried the main exchange–essentially a department store. The object of my search: a silver ink pen for signing printed copies.

Is that nauseating arrogance? Unmerited wishful thinking? Wasteful frivolity? A harmless confidence booster? 

I feel justified in that I already had a few coworkers tell me they want a printed copy signed by the author. And my wife ordered her own copy for me to sign simply for the thrill of ordering my book off Amazon. So if I’m going to leave a mark in someone’s book, I want to do it with a personal touch.

I settled on a silver gel pen and a metallic blue. I stashed the gold and green pens as well for funsies. My daughter claimed the rest of the set for her own artistic uses.

 

The first signed copy for someone without the same last name as mine.
 
A couple years ago or so, I started my author page on Facebook based on a presentation at our local writers’ group about building platforms online. (I haven’t followed all the advice, and I certainly haven’t built a platform worthy of recognition. But I have had the privilege of interacting with all sorts of interesting people, some of whom are even willing to read my blog ramblings. Thank you so much for the interaction and connection.)

One of my coworkers ribbed me, and declared of the author page, “This is one of the most wonderfully narcissistic things I’ve ever seen. I love it!” 

He might be right. I’m not sure how to feel about all these new experiences. I’m just enjoying the ride, self-centered though it may be.

I look forward to signing a printed copy of my upcoming fantasy epic for him. 

General

Oh Dark Thirty

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It’s 2:30 am, the witching hour normally reserved for caffeine-fueled policemen and bored cashiers at the 24-hour McDonald’s or gas station. And I’m getting ready for work. 
Joy-infused water is brewing in the background as I browse Facebook updates ranging from how my nephew’s doing post-surgery to how the Confederate rebel flag is a terrible symbol and should be taken down. 

 
Maybe I’ll stop at the gas station shoppette for an additional cup of Java to face the day. And I’ll share a knowing look with the attendant, or perhaps a yawn.

The things I do for a paycheck!

Awesome Children

Meat is Murder but Fishes are Delicious

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“I want to be a vegetarian.”My daughter surprised me with that declaration a couple days before her 16th birthday.

I paused a minute to let the whole “sixteen years old” thing sink in, because I don’t want to agree with it. But I have to accept it.

Back to the issue of food:

She saw a video showing some horrific examples of mistreatment and animal cruelty as part of the process by which all this mass-produced food appears on supermarket shelves. I don’t know that the video was the only factor in her decision but it clearly played a key role.

But there’s a problem. I’m a big fan of burgers and bacon and salmon steaks. If I can choose only one, meat lover’s is the pizza to order.

So her statement caused some consternation. Would meat in the house lead to fights over inhumane treatment of animals? Would she adapt to a healthy and nutritious diet, and not just junk food and non-meat? She does sometimes call a pack of Twizzlers lunch.

How far did she intend to take this?

Thankfully my wife and I also (mostly) choose our battles wisely. The girl wants to dye her hair blue and red in sections? Great. Have at it. This is not worth a fight. She wants black finger nail polish? Okay, I don’t like how that looks, BUT since she’s not showing any signs of anti-social behaviors or self-loathing and emotional issues that sometimes might accompany the darker color choices, it’s not worth fighting about.

She usually seems pretty straight-laced morally even if her socks are intentionally perpetually mismatched. A good head-on-her-shoulders, even if she makes blonde jokes at herself. Concerned for others, reliably making good decisions, and responsible enough that others are willing to trust her—so it’s not just parent bias talking.

Plus, at her age, we’re slowly becoming more like advisors and facilitators than direct authorities and overseers. Within two years she becomes an adult, able to make her own decisions and responsible to face the consequences. That’s not something we want to take 0 to 60 in one birthday.

And I need her to know that whatever she’s feeling, whatever she’s thinking, whatever she’s worried about, she has a safe place to come and discuss it. Shutting her down just because I don’t share her convictions will teach her to clam up and go elsewhere.

So instead of “What are you thinking?! Bacon!!” we discussed “Where do you want to draw the line in your diet? You need sources of protein, that’s my first concern, so where will you get those?”

And instead of bringing home a bunch of meat and ribbing her (pun intended) about how good it tastes, I bought the snacks I wanted for me and the rest of the family, then sought out some extra items that suit her current dietary plan: mixed nuts, a box of breakfast bars, some dried tropical fruit.

In this case, we got off easy. She intends to eat seafood. Sorry, fishies, you shouldn’t be so tasty. She is also fine with dairy products, even though there are certainly some examples of cruelty in that industry. So this change is fairly minor.

I’ve told her in the past that as our oldest, she’s unfortunately stuck with parents who have never done this before. We’re calling audibles and making this stuff up on the fly.

I feel like this is one I don’t hear often enough, and a good one to fall back on:

“I’m eager to hear what’s on your mind. I may not always agree with you. But I accept you and love you.”

Culture/Politics

Obey the Law

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The other day a Facebook post showed me a white police officer with the quote:

“It’s really simple–obey the law, and we’ll get along just fine.”

We do like our one-liners and hashtags when we talk about culture and politics in America. But anything that distills a complicated social issue down to one line is inherently ignorant, brushing aside facets and facts to make a punchy point.

I don’t think we should settle for ignorance, even if it sounds cool.

For example, on obeying the law, there’s a viral video showing what happens when two men legally carry their AR-15 rifles in public.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKGZnB41_e4

In case you don’t watch it, here’s the story:

The first man (average Joe white guy) is walking with a couple friends, all recording what comes next. A policeman shows up, exits his vehicle, approaches and asks for their IDs. The man says, “No, you have no need to take my ID, I’m not doing any crime.” The officer accepts this and begins questioning why the man is walking with an AR-15. The man replies, “Just exercising my rights as a legal firearm owner.” While the officer isn’t happy with this, the camera fades and we see nothing else after that.

The second man, who the video description calls a black man, walks down a street with his AR hanging at his side, untouched. His pregnant wife follows behind, both recording everything that happens next. A policeman stops in the street, steps out of his vehicle, draws his weapon and yells, “Get down on the street.” While the man lays in the street, he explains what he’s doing. “I am a legal firearm owner, exercising my rights to open carry, are you detaining me, sir?”

Not only is he detained, his wife is too. She is ordered (at 7 months pregnant) to sit on the curb while all this is sorted out. More police arrive, first one with gun drawn, then another car, then two others and still another. The police calmly approach and remove the AR, then search the man despite his protests and refusal to consent to search. He is led off to the sidewalk, his gun is taken (presumably for a check against some database), and a K9 unit arrives.

Both men obeyed the law but experienced a very different situation. One man was able to challenge the officer and flat out refuse to comply. One man’s life was threatened immediately for an extended duration.

Should I still believe it’s as simple as “Obey the law, and you’ll be fine” then?

But the sword of ignorance cuts both ways. There’s more to the story than the viral video suggests (go figure).

The two videos were shot in two different towns, one in Oregon, one in Nevada. What are the crime rates and demographics of those towns? We don’t know. From the video’s limited view, they do appear to represent two different economic levels. Is violent crime more prevalent in one than the other? Several factors can affect how police respond.

Both men set out to make videos about open carry rights, not anything race-related. The “black” man is actually a Hispanic Filipino. Certainly other minorities also can endure disparate treatment, so I’m not saying that to downplay the ridiculous difference in responses.

Supposedly a report was filed about the second man brandishing the weapon, but the video (and the longer original version) shows proof he did no such thing. Still, that report might partly explain a much more aggressive response.

The point is, an argument that chalks everything up to race might miss some key points. More importantly, I’m concerned by what seems like misleading and inaccurate presentation by this group claiming some kind of fair experiment where the only difference in the two clips is skin color of the gun owner.

In the process of writing a novel about racial tensions, I took time to research others’ experiences as well as what drives our reactions to race. I believe race is a factor in how we respond to one another on an unconscious level. I believe it because there is scientific proof.

Malcolm Gladwell’s Blink goes into this snap-judgment mechanism that helps our mind process myriad flows of information on a subconscious level. His book shows how this can be good in some cases, detrimental in others. In making his points, he presents examples of properly conducted scientific and sociological experiments. He addresses how our minds deal with the many emotions and notions we bring to the subject of race.

The end result? Turns out we’re all pretty racist, on the subconscious level. Thankfully, most of us control or resist those feelings very quickly, because we believe it’s wrong to judge someone on skin color. Yet experiments prove there’s still a delay between our conscious better reasoning and our unconscious first judgment.

Most of us–even the enlightened and progressive, even the cops–respond differently at first to the darker skinned person in cornrows than to a lighter skinned man.

Knowing that means we can think about it, talk about it, recognize it and work to reduce how long we operate off that misguided initial snap judgment. And then we can also talk about all those other factors and sides of the story that influence race relations.

That conversation won’t be simplified to a one-liner, and we can’t be satisfied with attempts to do so, regardless of which viewpoint we support.

General

Workend

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Language is both a hobby and a core component of my job. So I’m fascinated by the ways we use it.

Good, useful portmanteaus are a special favorite. What’s a portmanteau?

It’s a blending of two words into one. For example, smoke plus fog makes smog.

A co-worker and I were discussing our plans for Saturday and Sunday a couple weeks ago. Being the proactive and responsible type that he is, he planned to come in to do some work when our offices are empty and free of the myriad distractions caused by people.

I can’t remember which of us coined the term so I’ll give him credit for calling it a “workend.”

 

Found at quickmeme.com

Appropriate for this morning as I get ready for work… /sadface

Have a good weekend, or workend if you must!

Writing

Finding Myself on Amazon

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So I searched for my name on Amazon and to my delight, I see my two books available.

Elements of Critique (Kindle) is a 30-chapter guide to performing constructive critique and giving thorough feedback for writers and critique groups. It’s a revised compilation of the A-Z blog series I did last year. The topics cover a range of aspects to look for when reviewing a piece of writing, whether someone else’s or your own. Three chapters at the end lay out how to set up a potential critique group if a healthy one isn’t already available to you. A paperback version is available here.
Not to the Swift (Kindle) is my NaNoWriMo novel, born from my response to the dominant news story at the time: the tensions and protests in Ferguson, Missouri following the death of Michael Brown. I spent a couple months researching and reading about experiences outside my norm, because I couldn’t get the story I envisioned out of my head. A paperback version is available here.
 

Naturally there are several David Williamsons, so if you’re looking for ME, use the links in the text above.
 
Seeing these online is a surreal experience. I don’t know why it should feel strange; publishing–even self-publishing–is usually the point. Otherwise, why am I wasting my time? 

Yet it feels awkward to have my “babies” available to purchase at a click.

Needless to say, this is a small step by a fledgling writer. Anyone can self-publish anything and get it on Amazon, so I understand how much this does and doesn’t really mean.

But to me, it’s the end result of several months of effort and a milestone towards what I hope to accomplish in the future. With my fantasy novel in the hands of alpha readers, a couple Chicken Soup for the Soul of Military Families submissions in the works, and a sci-fi project currently a few chapters into the first draft, I’m excited about what lies ahead.

Thanks for encouraging and supporting me on the journey, wherever it leads. 

Writing

Best Indentions

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I should be posting a link to a published novel on CreateSpace right now…

Instead, I’m uploading a revised copy of the manuscript, after which I’ll have to wait (again) for the review process to complete.

Warning signs are usually placed for good reasons...
Warning signs are usually placed for good reasons…

Being this close to putting a novel on the market is exciting and a little nerve-wracking. Like a cold pool on a hot summer day, I just want to dive in and get the initial discomfort over with.

But the very first lesson in my Elements of Critique e-book is about proper format and appearance.

And when I saw a missing paragraph indent on the very first page of the novel, despite a couple thorough reviews, I knew I needed to take another look for more issues.

I fixed three: the original offending indent, a quotation mark all by its lonesome, and an overlooked * * * * * I often use between scenes in my manuscripts.

None of those would have been the end of the world. But I know how easily I become critical of self-published but poorly edited works. I know how distracting a missing punctuation mark or misspelled word can be.

If you’re going to do something, they say, take the time to do it right. No one will care that I had the best intentions to release a proper draft. All they’ll see is the result of my effort. So I need to make sure that the final product is correct.

Plus, when I pause to consider how different this process would be a decade or two ago, I have no reason to complain. Within a day, I’ll have a corrected proof copy ready for me to approve, and the book will be available. I don’t have to wait weeks for a letter from a publishing house, then wait a few more to send back the updated draft, then wait still more for a rough copy…

Yep, I have nothing to complain about.

The book is titled “Not to the Swift,” from a verse in Ecclesiastes that reminds us the victory in a race is not always to the fastest, nor is triumph in battle always to the strongest.

The “race” to publish quality work takes time too, which is frustrating.

But I’ll be happier with the end result, and more importantly, so will the readers.

So… deep breath, sip of coffee, back into the cover selection process…

Culture/Politics

A View on Israel

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This is a long post from about a year ago, written by Sam Harris, noted atheist (or perhaps anti-theist).

As with any complex issue, the subject of Israel and the Palestinians is not easily resolved or reduced to a clear-cut solution. But Mr. Harris points out what I know I’ve felt is a great disparity, and he lays out his case in a careful, thoughtful manner.

I don’t agree with everything he wrote, of course. But his assessment of this situation seems spot-on to me.

Why Don’t I Criticize Israel, by Sam Harris.