Tag Archives: doubt

Another in the Fire

Have you noticed that God has a way of bringing the unexpected message or song you need right at the time you need it?
I recall that when our oldest daughter got married and moved back to the States, that week at the chapel service was the first time I heard and played the Bethel version of “It Is Well.” Even though it felt like the seas of our family life were turbulent and shifting, I had to sing – and recognize – that those waves and wind still know His Name, and that through it all, with my eyes on Him, it would be well with me.

This week, my family sent our son Jon off to Thailand for LifeCompass, a four month missionary internship with Cadence International. It is both awesome and hard to see him go. As parents we worry for his safety; as Christians we praise God for working in and through him; as loved ones we will miss the joy and passion he brings to our home.

Last week at worship team practice, one of our magnificent singers, Rachel, introduced me to a song called “Another in the Fire” by Hillsong United. Jon is taking the words and the scriptures that inspired them with him, and I’m keeping them close to my heart. 
We all have fires and seas in our path. Maybe it’s the difference between who we know we should be and who we are. Maybe it’s a deep grief or frustrating struggle where we never seem to make headway. Maybe the doubts and uncertainties about what’s to come. Maybe it’s all those and more.
Whatever our struggle or challenge, there is Another who was with us, who is with us now, and who will be through it all. We can know that we will never be alone.

Not Yet

Your promise still stands,

Great is Your faithfulness, faithfulness.

I’m still in Your hands.

This is my confidence:

You’ve never failed me yet.

Elevation Worship has a song called “Do It Again” that is high on the CCLI and music app charts for the genre. It’s a strong tune with a driving beat and a lot of room to rock out with the worship band, yet the song also has a heartfelt, universally relatable theme, somewhat like a prayer:

God, this bad situation hasn’t changed yet, but I’m trusting You while I’m in the middle of it.

My wife and I both love the song, and I worked it into a testimony at church, relating a particular instance of God’s goodness to my family in the midst of a crisis (which I’ll share in another post).

However, my wife is not at all a fan of one word in the song: yet.

“God hasn’t failed us at all,” she explains, “and He’s not going to. We may not always get the answers we want, but God doesn’t let us down… and that word ‘yet’ makes it sound like maybe He might.”

I agree.

And yet…

To me, there’s this humanity, this frailty revealed in that wording. There’s a weakness that lurks in the lyrics just like it lurks in my heart, where even though I belt out that “This is my confidence: You’ve never failed me,” a little choked up voice adds a “yet” with a quiver or whimper.

Doubt whispers that maybe this is the one time. This is the exception. “Yeah, God came through before, but how sure are you?”

Maybe what I thought God was going to do isn’t what He has planned. Maybe the storm isn’t going to miraculously clear up and the waves aren’t going to suddenly fall into calm. Maybe He’s not going to say, “Peace, be still” this time.

I do have a testimony to share about how God met me and my family at a point of desperation and need. I have plenty of evidence of His goodness expressed through others and through sudden changes in our circumstances.

But I also see some dark clouds of the unknown looming over me, and the horizon is dimmed by billowing storms of delayed answers to prayers. It feels like as soon as one batch of questions and concerns are resolved, they tag new ones into the ring.

I apologize as I’m vaguebooking a bit here (we’re not on Facebook, so, blankblogging? blurposting?) mainly because I don’t even know all the questions or details of some of what’s on my mind.

One of the memory verses I am reviewing this week is Isaiah 41:10. It feels more appropriate than I would like.

“’Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭41:10‬ ‭NASB‬‬

I also relate all too well to the man who–in response to the assurance that with God, all things are possible–cried out, “Lord, I believe! Help my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24).

Surely He helps us in times like this. Great is His faithfulness, and His promises still stand. He’s never failed me…

Yet.