A reddit user commented on my Encanto Brandon Sanderson parody, suggesting that the REAL mash-up we needed was Non-Stop from Hamilton, but about Brandon’s insane writing discipline.
Which was like, “Yeah. Obviously.”
So that happened.
If you’re in the overlap on the Venn diagram of Sanderfans and Hamilfans or whatever the groups are called, this is for you.
Please note: References to G. R. R. Martin and R. Jordan are meant with only the deepest love and respect for their legendary impacts on the genre. When I thought about the characters and what they were saying in the original song, it seemed most fitting for Martin to fill the role of Burr and Jordan that of Washington. I think Angelica and Eliza are simply fantasy readers / fans.
(Here’s a poor GarageBand version of non-stop sanderson.)
Non-Stop
After my stories got published in stores
A-After my stories got published by Tor
I planned other series and pitched some more
I published mine and won awards
Even though I started long before his time
Brandon Sanderson began to climb
How to account for his rise to the top?
Man, the man writes non-stop
Fanbase of the Mistborn series, bear with me
Are you aware that there’s a shared hist’ry?
This is the first novel series I’ll write about this planet
With two or three to follow, I’ve planned it (non-stop)
I intend to move beyond this planet further out
Into a system of novels
Just novels, Sanderson, sit down.
Your varied series are all standalone.
Let’s just publish this.
That’s all you need to write
Oh right, One more thing—
Why do you assume all your books should tie into
All the other books you’ve written? This is new.
Why do you assume that your fans will follow through?
Soon that complex plan may be your doom
Why do you write like there’s no such thing as time?
Write day and night like there’s no such thing as time?
Every day you write, like you’ve sundered space and time
Keep on writing in between time — (non stop!)
World-building’s such an old thought that we can think
About in fantasy, and nowhere is it stronger than in magic themes
Its cost and its economy increasingly showing and
Honestly that’s more important than all the power schemes I’ve seen (non-stop!)
I drafted a law, I’ve practically perfected it
I’ve seen some weakness in the genre, I’ve corrected it
Hard magic systems need more clarity
If not, then the weak plot will leave readers feeling lost in mediocrity
Sanderson, teaching BYU creative writing
I’ll be posting all my classroom lectures on writing
Teaches the craft from drafting to selling it
Now what I’m going to teach should be worth telling it
Goes and proposes his own laws of magic use (What?)
His own laws for well thought-out magic use (What?)
Talks for twelve hours, and it’s all on a playlist
Bright young man, yo, writers should watch this!
Why do you always write with such belief?
Why do you always write with such belief?
Every story moral uplifting,
Free inspiration for your devotees
Why do you write, always so reliable? (hey!)
Why do you write, always so methodical? (hey!)
Every day you write, always reaching the next goal
Do what you do
(knock knock knock)
Hello Brandon?
Mr. Martin
Well, it’s the middle of the day
Can I come in, then?
Is this an author matter?
Yes, and it’s important to me
What do you need?
George, you’re a finer writer than me
Okay
I know they say I’m plain, my words restricted,
You’re incredible in prose
You’re verbose, descriptive,
Our fans need our very best,
You’re the solution
What’s on your chest?
A Song of Ice and Fire’s conclusion
No
Hear me out
No way!
A couple more novels, properly revised and published
Presenting the end for the public
No one will read it
I disagree
The show’s end failed!
George, that’s why we need it
The whole conclusion’s a mess
So there’ve been some tough lessons
Subverted expectations
So go back and address them
You have to start somewhere
No, no way
You’re making a mistake
Good night
Hey
What are you waiting for?
What do you stall for? (What?)
You wrote much more
What was it all for?
Do you support a strong conclusion?
Well yes
Then finish it
But what if all the readers have left?
Sir, you plotted and outlined and revised
For the rough draft of the novel you started to write
For fans who will buy all your books with pride
I don’t understand how you’re taking all this time
I’ll keep my next draft close to my chest (wait for it, wait for it, wait)
I’ll wait for the muse to show me where to go
I’m taking my time, watching the aftermath of the ending of my HBO show
I am turning to the Cosmere
I have been reading work by someone who always writes
I have found a wealth of novels that will
Keep me still reading for all my nights
He may write in layman’s prose, but heaven knows
Published on time beats “someday might”
My Brandon Sanderson
Collection’s grown in size
Look at where you are
Look at where you started
The fact that you still write is a miracle
Stormlight Archive – that would be enough
And if Reddit could steal a fraction of your time
If you can share what’s on your mind
That would be enough
Sanderson joins forces with a team of friends and family
To write a series of series, standing on their own but interconnected,
Entitled the Cosmere
The plan was to write a number of fantasy novels;
Each book would be complete on its own.
Thus far, the Cosmere spans 22 novels published over 17 years.
With pandemic weighing on his mind
And with several projects still on time
Sanderson wrote another secret four!
How do you write like you live outside of time?
How do you write like you live outside of time?
Every day you write like Investiture supplies
All the strength you need to find
All the words that you provide
How do you write like there’s never any block?
How do you write like you’re always on the clock?
How do you write like you’re never gonna stop?
Like you’re never gonna stop
Like you’re never gonna stop
They deserve the Wheel of Time
To be finished and complete
To have the ending that it needs
I’m asking you to finish it for me (one volume or three?)
I know it’s a lot to ask (one volume or three?)
To leave behind the worlds you wrote…
Sir, do you want me to write one final book or three volumes?
Three
Let’s go
Brandon Sanderson
They want to read
Brandon Sanderson
Look around, look around at how lucky we are to be a reader now
Published
They are wanting more to read
Look around, isn’t this enough?
Fans will never be satisfied (what would be enough?)
We will never be satisfied (So we theorize)
Theorize, fantasize
Fantasy has its eyes on you (Look around)
Why do you assume all your books should tie into
All the other worlds that your writing introduced (non-stop)
Why do you assume all your books should tie into (non-stop)
All the other worlds that your writing introduced (Fantasy has its eyes)
Why do you write like you live outside of time (non-stop)
Why do you write like
Fantasy has its eyes on you!
I am not givin’ away my plot! (Just RAFO)
I am not givin’ away my plot! (Just RAFO)
I am Brandon Sanderson
Sanderson, Just RAFO
And I am not givin’ away my plot!
